-
So I've moved into my new apartment. And tonight is my last night at work.

And since I don't have internet yet, it might be a while before I post again or before you can contact me.

That's okay. Go ahead and e-mail or comment or whatever. I'll get to it eventually.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

There is no such thing as "racism"

-
Do you know what one of the main problems is with modern day society? We're taught not to discriminate based on race. And while that might seem like a good thing, and you might be rather outraged right now, the entire concept is fundamentally flawed. The problem is that teaching people this concept instills them with the idea that there is such a thing as "race." There isn't. "Race" is a socially construct based on a person physical appearance or geographic location. Genetically, there is no basic difference between one person and the next. Obviously, because we're all different, there are genetic deviations. But there is nothing to establish "race." There might be differences based on a person's ancestral geographic home, where an entire group of people gathered in a specific type of environment and procreated based out of a small genetic pool. And there might be physical differences because of those environments and the extensive amount o...
Read more

Jericho

-
I am...I don't know. My head is...I don't know. There's a whole mess of I-don't-know running through my brain. The heater keeps turning on and I want to kill it. But I don't want to get up. That wasn't what I wanted to say. That wasn't the thing inside my head trying to get out. And yet it appeared anyway. I felt high last night, humming at the foot of my bed as I played a game, listening to a random mix of songs I'd already approved. Songs that have been running through my mind since my obsession with hearing them began some several weeks ago. The world felt nice around me. Quiet and dark. I felt alone. I felt that feeling when you ask to be left alone and people listen and comply without the implication that "are you upset about something?" or are being anti-social. Who could blame us, though? The social of the world sucks. How dare you shut down your mind? How dare you think the thoughts that are your own? Where was I going? Wh...
Read more

The Dead Zone

-
I know a lot of it is the meds talking, specifically the meds failing that is talking, but I just feel so....dead. I can't think of anything to do creatively. And when I do think of something, I don't have the motivation for it. I open the internet browser and after responding to all the Arcade threads, I don't know how to spend my time. I binge watch a show, and then can't stand it enough to finish it. I switch genres, and then there isn't enough to fill the time. I try to work and can't concentrate for more than 15 mins. I have, roughly, a 12 hour day and I don't know how to spend the time. And then when the time is spent, I don't know what I've spent it doing. I'm lost and alone and in the woods. It's snowing and it's cold, and I don't have the proper attire. I'm abandoned and given up on and rejected. I don't have a signal. I'm looking for a sign. All I see is the same old trees. And I've neve...
Read more

Ahh, that's some good lemonade.

-
I have a new new job. I lost the old new job. I have a new new friend. The old new friend isn't much of a friend. But it's all an improvement. I enjoy the new new job better. The new new friend is a great friend. I miss her. But she's busy getting better. That's more important than finding time to play cards with me. There's a new purpose to my support group, which is better than the old purpose. Which was no purpose. I almost feel not depressed. Almost. I still feel it in the back of my mind, like a warm sweater wrapped around my cerebellum. I don't know that it will ever go away. I don't know that I want it to go away. It's too familiar. Too much of a safety net to fall back on. I'm sure that's what my therapist would say too. But I don't know how I feel about him sometimes. He feels like a friend. But a nagging friend. And we're not working on the problem I want to work on. Interjection: I called a new lawyer, finally, since th...
Read more