Rituals.

I wish crying was easier.

I always find it a little strange when people talk about balance and harmony as being two things: right and wrong, good and evil. That would mean that for the world to be balanced, there would have to be as much evil as there is good, and I just don't believe that. Instead, think of balance as standing on one foot. Are you doing two things? No, just one: balancing. Balance and harmony aren't about opposites but rather about everything being one thing. The key to balance is not being pushed or pulled in any one direction but rather choosing the path that you want to take. An unbalanced life is one where you're not making the choices yourself. Good and evil are just the terms we use to describe whether or not something was fortuitous for us. Balance is about knowing the value in everything we encounter.

I have a new new job. I lost the old new job. I have a new new friend. The old new friend isn't much of a friend. But it's all an improvement. I enjoy the new new job better. The new new friend is a great friend. I miss her. But she's busy getting better. That's more important than finding time to play cards with me. There's a new purpose to my support group, which is better than the old purpose. Which was no purpose. I almost feel not depressed. Almost. I still feel it in the back of my mind, like a warm sweater wrapped around my cerebellum. I don't know that it will ever go away. I don't know that I want it to go away. It's too familiar. Too much of a safety net to fall back on. I'm sure that's what my therapist would say too. But I don't know how I feel about him sometimes. He feels like a friend. But a nagging friend. And we're not working on the problem I want to work on. Interjection: I called a new lawyer, finally, since th