There is no such thing as "racism"

Sometimes I wish the world was reversed. Then, I think, I might fit right in.

We should start an Insomniacs Club on NMU's campus. Then, maybe, I'd actually have someone to talk to.

Speaking of talking to (well, actually it has nothing to do with talking to anyone, it was just my way of changing the subject without it being abrupt and awkward...which I think I screwed up.)

Anyway.

So I was just scanning the list of other bloggers in Marquette, when I came across one that I thought was interesting. Obviously, I'm not going to say who it was, 'cause that'd be rude. And while I'm not above being rude, I'm still not going to say.

Right, so, my attention was caught by a few things they said and I decided to read their blog. So I did. And then I went and read their archived posts.

Now my question is: Does this seem slightly stalkerish to anyone besides me?
I mean, I'm the one who did it and even I'm freely admitting it's weird. It was weird, right?


:sigh: Oh well, such is such.

I got a bunch of writing done on my "War Horse" novel. So that was good. Was able to redirect and rewrite the beginning, get it to where I want it to go, get it to sound how I wanted. Good stuff. Though, it needs a better title, obviously. Although, come to think of it, I don't think I ever actually made "War Horse" the title. I think I just put it there because I needed to call is something.

My "Warrior" novel needs a title too. That one will be harder. I got a bunch of writing done on that one last week. It's coming along nicely.

Which is more than I can say for "The Guardian's Quest". (does that sound as corny to you as it does to me?). Man I've never had some much trouble writing something that I wasn't getting a grade on. I've rewritten, reviewed, redrawn, redesigned, reloaded, redone this concept at least 5 times. I just can't seem to get it just right. The central idea is fine. It's just a matter of the plot and character details. With this one, though, I think I might be putting too much pressure on myself. I seem to be under the impression that if I'm going to be a fantasy writer, then I have to have a "quest" novel. You know, bunch of people are thrown together and have to go save the world from a big, scary evil. It's kind of a staple in the genre. Which I think is why it's causing me so much trouble. I mean, I want to have a novel like this, because I love novels like this. But I also strive to make my writing unique. I'm not under the impression that I'll be able to write anything new. As they say, any storyline that can be done, has been done. And for the most part I find that that's true. Every time I start writing something, I'm either getting the idea from somewhere or I end up seeing my idea somewhere. "Shadows of the Sun" was inspired by the "Children of Dune" mini series. "Adam & Eve" by the Battlestar: Galactica mini series. The current reload of "Guardian" by "The 13th Warrior". The list goes on. Where was I? Oh, right, unique. So I'm not under the impression that I'll be doing anything "new", it's just a matter of telling it a way no one has before. And throwing in just the right amount of twist at just the right moment. Plus, in these big adventure novels, someone, one of the good characters, always dies. I'm sorry, but at this stage in my writing career, I have yet to develop the ability to kill my characters. I love my characters. That's why I created them the way I did. Oh wait, there is one story where the characters die, but that one it's fitting in with their personality and history. Oh and the main character dies in "Warrior", but it doesn't really count as a death, so therefore I can't really consider it as "a novel where I kill a character".

I think I lost my point again.

:sigh: It happens.

Let's see, soundoff.
- "Rise of the Phoenix": that one causes me a great deal of trouble. The character was inspired by a book I didn't even read (it was very dull). I've rewritten that one a couple times. But as with "guardian's quest", I like the concept too much to throw it out.
- "Shadows of the Sun": As with any of my novels, I have to be in just a certain mood to right on this one. It's a mood that comes and goes. This one I have the plot fairly well nailed down. It's just a matter of writing it all out. It isn't usually a high priority novel, though, so it doesn't get much attention.
- "The Guardian's Quest": This one just makes me cranky.
- "The Reapers": This one is good. But it needs to be darker. And it's very philosophical, so it's rare that I'm in a pensive enough state to write anything for this novel and have it be helpful.
- "War Horse": It's coming. Slowly, but getting there.
- "Warrior": My main novel. I do the most work on this one. I jump around a lot too. Sometimes it's just a paragraph. In fact, I have a separate document for just random pieces of the story. The only problem is that I write them to express the mood I'm in, but then they don't always fit in with the story. So then I have to change them. But changing them usually takes away from the initial value and style of the original piece. So I try to change as little as possible in the actual writing and adjust the plot instead. It's very risky and very delicate. Like spinal surgery (get it? cause it's a novel and books have a spine? okay, yeah it was lame.).

After my main novels, there's my "other" folder (everything's classified in folders. I hate just having documents sit around. everything's very organized on my computer. It makes for more work when I want to get something, but it makes it better...plus it helps shut my O.C.D up (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder)....I should really get tested to make sure I actually have it and aren't just crazy....not that I'm not crazy too, but.

Anyway, that's neither here nor there.

My other folder has a folder in it called "probably not". Most of these are ideas based on dreams. Some mood pieces that don't fit in any novels but aren't enough to stand as a story on their own. The rest of the documents in the "other" folder are also "probably not"s, but they aren't as "probably not" as the actual "probably not"s.

And hopefully all the quotations made that statement easier to understand and not harder.

the "other" folder:
- "Adam & Eve": Tagline: "Humans created Artificial Intelligence. That was our mistake. Artificial Intelligence created Artificial Humans. That was theirs." 'bout genetically created twins and how they're supposed to infiltrate humanity and help destroy it. But one decides to side with humans and the other sides with the robots. Fairly standard. Probably seen/heard/read something similar. It's that whole theory that there are only three stories in the entire world (or just in the fantasy genre). Something like that.
- "Identity": you know, I don't even remember what this one was about. Why isn't it in the "probably not" folder? Oh well, is now.
- "Jill": Another "artificial human" story. World has changed, no women. Man creates artificial chicks (kinda like a non-robotic version of Chobits (if that helps)). Some are servants, some are...:cough:, well you know....and others, like our main character, are pitted against each other like gladiators or animals. But, and this is very standard, there's something about our main character that makes her different. Course, if the main character wasn't different, who'd read it? Anyway, it's fairly interesting based on the point of view and the voice that I tell it in. Course I haven't worked on it since August, so saying it's taken a back burner would be a gross understatement.

Let's see. No skip that one, it's more an outlet for my insanity than anything else. Next: ah, one of my "concept" novels, where I try out a new way writing or a new voice/tone for writing in. Next: "Reaper"? I have a reaper, what's this one. Ohhhh....that one. Never mind. That should be in the p.n. folder. Next: another outlet for my insanity. Next: oh, this short story idea. I think I'm saving that for an English class. Next: bleech. That was a dream that I thought was a good idea. It started okay, but as I tried to drag out the plot, it began to sound like a bad romance novel. I hate romance novels. But if I go back to the original dream, I think it'd make a good short story. Next: (I realize you probably don't care about any of this, but I'm not really doing it for you, now am I?) that was an...idea. I'm not really sure where I was going. I think short story. Kind of a Watcher-ish story (watcher as in Buffy), but with the premise that the Watcher just says "fuck it, I'm done with this whole "chosen one" crap, I don't want to do it anymore than they do". Not that it was supposed to have any real relation to Buffy. It's not where I got the idea from. Actually, I got it when I was watching this movie where....you know what, never mind. Next: Oh, "Where in the World is Lorna Vaughn?". This one I actually like. The plot is a little shaky but the concept is sound. The only problem with this one is that I seem convinced it's a movie and not a book. It has all these directorial notes, like camera angles and voice overs. I've got the entire opening sequence mapped out. It's weird. Actually, I think it would make a very good cult film, but I think I might get in trouble with the title. It might not be obvious, but I got the title idea from "Where in the World is Carmen Santiago?". Subtle, huh?

Anyway, that's it really. I should probably go to bed now. Got math in the morning and I've been writing for, like, an hour. These things always end up longer than I think they are. huh, I noticed I gave you plot summaries for all the minor stories but not the major ones. Interesting. Well, maybe next time. If you're good.

Okay, now down to the business of saying good-bye.

Weird thought: Ever notice how when you stare at a digital clock, waiting for the time to change, you never actually see it change? You're staring at it, waiting for it, expecting it, then all of a sudden you notice...hey it changed. When did it do that? You don't see the change, you just happen to notice that the change occurred. Try it. It's fun. Plus it makes time go really, really slow.

Music: Man, I'm such a music junkie: Plus, I'm trying to remember what I put last time:

"Come on Closer" Jem.
Anything by Maroon 5.
"Run" Snow Patrol.
"This is War", "Silhouettes", "Therapy" Smile Empty Soul.
Nelly Furtado's first album.
"Brackish" Kittie.
"Love Song" 311.
"We Are" Ana.
"Fly" Hilary Duff (I'm sorry, Ringo. But if it makes you feel better, I don't like her, just some of her songs).
"I'm Shakin'" Rooney (to make up for the Hilary Duff).
"Creep" Stone Temple Pilots (also to make up for Hilary Duff).
"No One Knows" Queens of the Stone Age (still for Hilary Duff).
"Again" Lenny Kravitz (Hilary Duff requires a lot of making up).
"Fine Again" Seether (Last One for Hilary Duff).
"Don't Speak" No Doubt (this is just for writing you-know-who's name so many times).

Oh and "Not One of Us" from the Lion King 2 soundtrack. I don't know why I love this song, I just do.

And notable mention: These songs are being listed with the number of times they've been played on my computer (and since I recently got this computer, the number is only accurate from late August until now. On my old computer, the numbers were in the thousands.)

1. "Stupid" Sarah McLachlan. 670. (this one reached over a thousand on my old computer in a matter of just a few months)
2. "Wild is the Wind" Cat Power. 658 (randomly caught this song on Star Search of all places. Credit goes to "letssingit.com" for their search engine. It lets you search by lyrics, not just artist and title.)
3. "Aeryn Sun's Funeral" Farscape. 568 (I don't think this one is even on the official soundtrack. Thank you KaZaA)
4. "Logan And Rogue" Michael Kamen (X-men Soundtrack). 218. (this one is actually number six, not four. It should be with the top three, in the 600's. But because it plays so quietly, I don't include it on my sleep list. I can't hear it unless I turn everything else way up. (Windows Media Player has a enhancement that lets you *supposedly* equal out the volumes on different tracks. But it doesn't work very well. Generally you get loud CD tracks and quiet MP3s. The enhancement pretty much just reverses this. Or makes loud thing louder and quieter things quieter, depending on the result you actually want to get.) :sigh: I might have to look into getting WinAmp. But that means exporting my files, re-setting up my playlists, re-editing all the track info. Such a hassle.)

Anyway, that's it for me. It's *roughly* an hour past my bedtime.

So, lata.